February 27, 2010

the Slammer . Annabelle & Azure

spent the bulk of the night of debauchery at the Slammer Tavern with Azure who I have not seen in years. it is awesome to be able to connect with a dear friend like the passage of time has not eroded the connection. we were fed beers by the dear sweet Annabelle & engaged in dialogue by the owner Lizzie. This is one of the best dive bars in Portland & Lizzie is a self made owner of awesomeness.

Annabelle oh Annabelle . do you know that your sweet and beautiful face is only a small part of the enjoyment of being around you.

as the night moved on Azure and I were rebel rousing through the rose city, drunk & laughing as we explored. we were looking for the new source for my twisted revolution. Azure can see in the recent model work that i am bored. he thinks i need to take a fresch take on the pinup theme of old with my post modern twisted work that has texture and backgrounds that are a modern enhancement. i am not sure how this challenge will percolate through my mind and into my art, but it certainly will transpire.

Jamesons neat on a light table in a red background of contrasting brick. this was the end of the night for Azure & i. the gold torso is my favorite brick front building. cobblestone cobblestone brick beauty.

this blog is brought to you by the fresch klesch's iphone, Azure & fueled by alcohol!

February 24, 2010

fairy tales & the stars are the stuff of storybooks

I was struggling with this in the willyweek; is it talking about me or too me? fairy tales or story books are the lasting impressions we all learn. i like to aim high to be happy with where i end. so i like to dream of the future and learn from the past.

endeaver to be further. realize you are worthy. and then enjoy what transpires

"More than a few fairy tales feature the theme of characters who accidentally find a treasure. They're not searching for treasure, don't feel worthy of it, and aren't fully prepared for it. They may initially not even know what they're looking at, and see it as preposterous or abnormal or disquieting. Who could blame them if they ran away from the treasure? In order to recognize and claim it, they might have to shed a number of their assumptions about the way the world works. And they might have to clear up a discrepancy between their unconscious longings and their conscious intentions." free will astrology

i will always believe in the future with hope and smiles.!

the comfort of strangers

Comfort Of Strangers by Beth Orton
I know the stars that shine on me,
Are brighter than you or I could ever be.
I know there's an answer to your question,
But I don't if I could word it right.

Say what you mean,
Don't tell it like it could be,
I'm not sure that I should say it out loud,
Say what you mean,
Don't tell it like it could be,
Right at this time, I'm gonna keep that in mind

One love, is better than not enough
I'd rather have no love, than messing with the wrong stuff

Just the comfort of strangers
Always the comfort of strangers
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.

I know the sun that shines on me,
Has better times than you or I could ever be,
I know there's an answer to the question,
and I'm not sure that I should word it right,

Say what you mean,
Don't tell it like it could be,
Everytime your gonna set me free,
Say what you mean,
Don't tell it like it could be,
Right this time, let's take it right home to see

One love is better than not enough
I'd rather have no love, than messing with the wrong stuff,
It's just the comfort of strangers
Oh it's the comfort of strangers

Why, some of those are like best friends, best friends,
Ones that keep you coming round again

February 23, 2010

thank you beth for Heart of Soul

Heart of Soul by Beth Orton

Curl up inside me
C’mon hide for a while
Look in your eyes i see
Looking back is a child
That we, we dance a fine line
We didn’t take much time
You can’t watercolor a fire cracker
And you you’re laying face down
With your heart of soul
Selling it cheap on the commercial rd

Where is the love in your heart
C’mon put a little love in your heart
Where is the love in your heart
C’mon put a little love in your heart

Magpies and maelstroms
Always hard hitting hailstorms
No blame no forgiveness
We consent and we complete this
And we, we dance at the precipice
When we get close like this
You can’t put out a fire with no crocodile
And me, i’m laying face down
So tell me what Neil Young said
You pick a flower then it’s dead

Put a little love in your heart
C’mon put a little love in your heart
I don’t care how much religion you’ve got
You gotta put a little love in your heart

And you , you look at me in disbelief
Like you could teach me God
When all of a sudden
I’m consumed by love
And you, are all lighting up
With your heart of gold
And everything we touch just turns to soul

Put a little love in your heart
You know you put a little love in my heart
I gotta put a little love in your heart
C’mon put a little love in my heart
C’mon put a little love in your heart
I wanna feel a little love in my heart
I’m gonna put a little love in your heart
A whole lotta love in your heart
Whole lotta love in your heart
There’s a whole lotta love in your heart

Curl up inside me
C’mon hide for a while

February 22, 2010

the luscious muse

i read this quote recently that if you want to get over a women, you should write. i chuckled because this is oh so very true, but on the flip side the opposite is true also, at least for me. if i want to remember a women, and know her true depths, i write.

in the last year, i have not written much about the loss. not sure if that means it wasn't a loss or that i just cannot find words. i have felt the pressure and need in that time, but this blog is all that consistently comes out.

in the more recent times i can say that the latter is a little more as i feel inspired to express something long thought to be lost. the inspiration always comes in the form of a woman as muse.

February 21, 2010

because, it all began to change on my birthday each day stronger until . . .

there are times in ones life when they just reach for the whisper that the winds can bring. time elapses for the very reason that we participate and sometimes create something from just an idea.

first poem of 2010.

it's late February with the early spring sun
emily is playing in the yard
i am sitting at the table staring at tree's that still have no leaves
i feel so alone here
the birds are singing their love song to spring
i wish you were here so i could sing my love song to you
the girls playing and giggling
this sun is nice and warm for late February
so much hope at the start of spring
emily keeps bringing me leaves from the rhodi in the garden
her gorgeous blue eyes are glowing in the sun
so much wonder and awe
how gently we are in this silence
my soul longs to express for you
i keep thinking their is redemption in that expression
for me it is the release of love so long bottled and beaten back from neglect
for you it is the acceptance of love so long withheld from cruel lovers
i want your hand to hold mine and your heart to fill with a love for all the ages
this overflowing bounty that is the story of us
redemption is ours for the taking
as am i for the action and refrain - you only need to show me your heart is open and you desire the capacity to express the deep capacity of your heart bursting with love
i seek only a way to express my grand love for life and a safe place to seek refuge from the cruel world that sucks my positive energy
emily is sitting next to me now in this warm sun
she wants me to read her this poem and write more about her beautiful eyes
she says its nice to love someone - you feel so nice
the sun feels wonderful in this late February moment
listening to the birds sing their love song to spring
i wish you were here next to me in this warmth
the girls singing in the yard, playing and giggling
such hope in this spring day
i want to sing a love song to you that warms your soul

February 19, 2010

the unified theory of love

First published in Manic Rose City, copyright Sunshine Ink 2006.

unified theory

thence nothing whatsoever
lest we find ourselves alone
head gone mad from the subtle erotic explosions
how often is it that we fall?
after so long in perfect strides
perchance her wanton ado
left perilous melancholy
oh hadst our goblet glee
never damn your haste to love
for where is a gift lost before bestowed –
that beautiful bounty which comforts pleasure and leaves us feeling whole
a penchant for the divine walking verbose –
we never tire of being close
how often can one call her amor`
has no clever been lost like this before
i want for there is no-thing beyond desiring a bum – lost in Dharma
can our dignity claim respite from within
no fewer than before – we talk to loose our sight – fancied match a delight
in taste we wash our throes in passionate flowers
for it is she you love in all this haste or
was it she who claimed the head of the lion
and left me wanting evermore inclined

February 17, 2010

untitled poem from upcoming book Chasing Skirt, copyright Sunshine Ink 2010.

tiny retro curves in the punk inked style
one last lunch with Virginia over greasy burgers and dark pints of beer
it’s vintage here with orange glow globes and scratched mahogany panels
the photography is black and white from the roaring twenties
when my flapper girls gave a roaring night to any accommodating kat
it’s almost time to say goodnight
my sweet Virginia if we could only extend out stay just a few more days
we could have a little fun and one more lunch to remember it all by

February 14, 2010

a tribute to the light of my life

emily grace klesch, born august 3rd 2005, named after my distant relative Emily Dickinson, and the reason i get up every morning.

she will one day be a more famous and influential artist than i can ever dream of.

she has the power to change the world!

just some of my favorite shots of her over the last year!

February 13, 2010

because sometimes love involves pain

i was listening to a Pearl Jam song, Just Breathe the other day and it made me smile at the truth in the statement. "I’m a lucky man to count on both hands, The ones I love, Some folks just have one, Others they got none!" i can say that other than friends and family, i have had the pleasure of loving 3 different women in my life. the interesting thing about love is that it tends to be a wonderful experience ripe with heartache.

the first, barbara, my high school sweetheart, she celebrated me for all i was and labeled me as sunshine. the odd thing about a first love is that sometimes it can be scary, especially when that love fans the flames of desire and shakes up life for some so young. i know she loved me and i certainly did they same, but several moments in time my Sagittarian ways of bullish verbal sparing i ran her over and though i think neither of us wanted to leave each other, we did, and she quickly went to someone else & i only looked back twice before forgetting why we ever walked away. i spent a long time (7yrs) getting over her, yeah, when you love and are loved sometimes you don't want to let go. it was this relationship and its emotional intensity, sex, and story book start that i did not believe could be reproduced. after those 7 yrs in the desert she found me in my loft and we have been friends ever since. in a way we both profoundly affected each others life because a few months ago she told me that she married the guy after me because he would never break her heart the way i did. many of the life decisions related to women and walls and relations since here have been conducted because of that experience.

the second is a story of love at first site and destiny, but also of unrequited love. you see, i met aimee one day in extraordinary circumstances, and spent the next 3 years in a non-physical relationship with her. we were a perfect match and still to this day she is the only person i have asked to marry. now of course she said no, and maybe never really loved me anywhere near the place i did. i changed my life for her and then forsook that life for the one i have now. regrets, maybe, pain, yes, love, very much. someday when i am dead they will publish my notebook from that time and it will read like the most tragic love letter ever.

the third, tara, a perfect balance to my exuberant nature who at once celebrated my kinky style and elevated it beyond repose. we spent a few months paralleling each other and one month of bliss. the last day we spent together was fabulous and full of art and sex and love. i know this because she said it and i always felt it when she was around. she supported my art, my soul and she said she loved me the night she left me for a girl. she was younger than me by several years, and at an age i think that sort of connection scares you. i wrote one of my best poems about her, and manic rose city is really a love story for her. i still feel her comfort today and am so very happy we can talk again and share our lives. her soul has so much comfort in it for me and her words are piercing, but i love her because she understand me, accepts me and celebrates me.

a general theme, i can only love if i see that a woman knows my soul. endeaver to be worthy, because i am worth it. my art is all about those stories and the beauty that women evoke! i have always wanted a great love affair for the ages, and sometimes wonder if anyone is capable of meeting me on that level. i believe in soul mates and eternal love, but i also believe many people can be the loves of our life because we must learn that being complete is only found inside of us.

there may be a fourth, and fifth and ? out there as i have recently heard a women i have never met in person describe my soul. there is also a woman i know who i have had a crush on since i first met her at a betties party. she makes me nervous every time i am near her and i want only to celebrate her, but love is a funny thing full of pain that in her i cannot figure out how to move past her wall of hurt or show her me without my persona.

February 9, 2010

a story of joy & sunshine! part 3

I choked out a laugh, as I stared at the white pale house, number ????, which always had a for rent sign out for a small amount of time, then didn’t, then did again. Azure was starting to back track on the yellow line towards our last nexus, saying he had found a new paint line that originate about fifteen feet from the car, in the street.

“Hey, you know that house right there where it started. That’s the house I told you about that has the sign ‘for rent’ out a lot then not, like the renter keeps killing his tenants and doing some crazy shit to their bodies.”
“Yeah yeah, weird man. What do you think he is doin?”

“I don’t know, but it always feels weird to walk by this house. Its white for Christ sake.”

Back at the nexus, we head east down Everett, back across the 405 and into my beloved Pearl district. I have been here almost 4 years and am still in love with its energy and vibe. Thought the vibe is slowly starting to kill me as it changes, this place will always be my city. We soon found ourselves back at the original nexus two blocks from the loft. It had come full circle, which mean the original way we went was the starting section and the artist had actually turned right down Flanders towards my loft as we turned left to go the same direction. “Azure, this means that at some point the artist picks up the yellow line therefore breaking its continuous nature…”

“Or they doubled back on themselves, and hence could have a tri-point nexus that lead to both the beginning and the end of the journey.”

“At the front porch of ???? NW Everett, the house people die to live in.”

“Like the alpha and the omega.”

“Hey, there is this house up on 21st, just a couple of blocks off of Burnside that has cargo freight trucks in the yard”

“Yeah Yeah, I showed you that one. They are definitely up to no good.”

“That’s right you showed me that one, right there in the heart of it all. How can no one see what is happening?”

“Do you think its meth cooking, or pot growing?”

“Both with Mercedes in the driveway.”

“Maybe it’s the Feds, or terrorists.”

We were now at the corner of 13th and Flanders, in from of the doorway to PICA’s Landmark art exhibit, the old Reed/Harris print building, and the yellow line showed signs of origination, scattered splatters, and two trails. One led back towards my loft, and the other crossed Flanders and headed north up 13th. I had seen the yellow line in front of my balcony, and even followed it on some parts as it went up 11th towards Burnside st. It always seemed like a funny little yellow brick road game. Here I was with Azure, on a fine night chasing the yellow line to its origins.

We followed it up 13th a black, and down Glisan towards the other side of the McKenzie Building, and back to where we first caught it outside the side door under my balcony. Funny how it goes full circle for us, back to our starting point. We followed it up 11th towards Burnside, and finally lost our interest as we headed past Powells books.

Azure piped up just then,” want to get a beer at the tugboat. Its Sunday after all.”

I responded with a quick, “Yeah yeah” and off we went to the park blocks and across Burnside.” Right as we were walking up past one of the little brick outhouses, down the street came Jonney the Fish with a big old smile. Perfect!

February 5, 2010

a story of joy & sunshine! part 2

“Azure chimes in, yeah, this is what I love about environmental pop-art like this. Its like the spray-painted stencil designs you see on corners. Just to make the everyday 9-5 guy think a little more. I love this shit. Makes your mind explode on the possibilities.”

“Kind of like tags, and graffiti. Political statements, youthful unrest…”

“yeah but this makes your mind expand, most graffiti is done by a suburban punk white rich kid who is bored with his mom and dad’s money.

“Now that is blasphemy that I would spout.” And off we walk following the yellow line up 14th, Azure is the same crazy as me.

The yellow line at each corner would do a loop around the light post, as if the artist was spinning around the pole. There would be a splatter pattern as they stood waiting for the light. We figured they did it at night, but this suggested daytime to have to wait for lights to turn. Maybe there would be an occasional car at night, but no one has perfect timing at a corner to always have to wait. It was fund to think of these deliberate motives the artist had in creating this yellow brick road. Azure and I were obviously being led somewhere on some trek. We both thought it a ball, and being happily engaged in our brains, we relished the sport of following the rabbit trail.

Our next excitement came at NW couch st. where the yellow line took an abrupt right to cross the 405 freeway and officially head out of the Pearl district. I made this comment as Azure and I stood smoking a cigarette waiting to cross the freeway exit traffic onto 16th. Azure pointed at the paint splatter on the edge of the sidewalk that slope to the roadway for the handicapped. It was as if the artist shook the can a bit waiting to crass as we were. They had done their customary twirl around the pole and stopped to cross the street. The light turned and off we went again quite eager to see where it led us next. As we were heading up 16th, a one-way street the opposite direction from 14th, I think we were heading north. The yellow line got faint at some spots over the next two to three blocks. As if the can were getting empty, but soon we found it heavy and steady again as we came up upon Everett st. At the corner of Everett was another nexus of the yellow line. We could go left or right back into the Pearl. We chose to go left because up till then it felt like we were following the line backwards. The stroke of the paint splatter always looked like the Artist as walking the opposite the way we were, so by going left we were presumably heading towards its origin.

We walked a block up Everett, and found that the yellow line circled back towards itself in the street in front of parking spot, in front of a house. Here we had to have a source since it just stopped, and there appeared to be several blotched of concentrated yellow acrylic paint. Azure was looking around to see if he could find any other trace when I turned around and looked at the house in which an artist had to park there car before embarking on their yellow brick road making.

February 3, 2010

its hump day . lets get it on!

i have been insanely busy the last couple of weeks, shooting, editing, playing, drinking and closing deals. i am looking forward to the Betties party at Kelly's, seeing some friends, and mingling with the punk sex kitten's i used to sponsor. going to recruit, flirt and mingle!

so, here are a couple of shots from the recent shoot of my favorite dear aimee . she is supersexy!