March 2, 2010
i sit here tonight a couple of days removed from the most perfect weekend. a couple of days prior to what feels like redemption & the passage of an anniversary that can no longer have any meaning or power in my life.
i sit here thinking only of the future, knowing the past has no power though it has given me all the lessons & smarts one can only hope for. i wonder what you think & if you could ever believe is something so grand as futures untold.
sometimes in the moments of most joy or promise, i feel my most alone. like right now. i fear what is not quite mine to tough and have known this dream to be close but right as you reach for it, it vanishes. this moment will pass in time and make its way back again at another juncture. i know this because my life has been filled with them in some form of cycle of time i cannot predict but sometimes can control.
i want to luv you for reasons i cannot fully put down in black and white.
i have changed again from where i was over the last five plus years & these changes have all led me to you & some dream of redemption in a life of celebration & balance to those things we share.