August 20, 2010
i used to be able to disconnect from work or parts of my life but not any more, at least not while i have a singular focus on all that is encompassed in my art. on a daily basis is the daily mantra. it has definitely paid dividends in the art, mental well being and exposure.
the strange thing about this vacation is that i was at least able to block out saving the world, AA politicos, and all the other semi drama grist. it was an emily and art vacation with a drive, several swims, some rock climbing, a hike and thoughts kinda good times. the weirdest part was the poor begs and wild dreams i had.
in the sunny moments and in the hotel rooms i was always reminded of other trips. some i cannot quite remember all of but one in particular is going to be important. a whole chapter In a Square's Guide to Being Punk, the one dealing with trysts, whores, strippers, art and a collage sports team. all very good things to expose the square too!
i wonder what all of my fetishes are. i know of a few, related to fishnets, boots . .. . a lot of what i think of that may also fit that are really just curiosities. things to be interesting in understanding, as that is just more fodder for the art. every day. .. a little more erotica to weave into the art. this and my night photography will be the remembrance of my grander portfolio of work left behind. i am brash and believe i can make art out of what the masses may call porn and this is a bold legacy to leave behind with a voice that does not know where all the boundaries are between curiosities and fetishes.